I'm Tired of French Bread!


Je suis fatigué
        du bon pain français.

Ya’ know what I said –
        I’m tired of French bread!

I’ll never understand French gastronomy.
    For breakfast I beg for an egg.
        But what is set before my eyes?
            A basket of French bread – instead!

I thought the French loved to eat?
        For breakfast I’m longing for meat.
                            For bacon I pray
                            Like a starved castaway.
            But what do I get?
                Café au lait
                    avec
                                     du bon pain et beurre.*

Je suis fatigué
        du bon pain français.

After a stroll on the Champs Elysees
        I order a sandwich for lunch.
When it arrives,
        I feel so deprived.
                I can’t find the meat,
                        it’s thin as a sheet
                               and buried between that French bread!

Je suis fatigué
        du bon pain français.

Loaves like brassieres do abound:
        long,
            short,
                    fat, and thin ones
                                are found.

I will admit
        bread-draped windows have charm,
                but it’s even under the arms
                        of men mocking Valjean
                                while fleeing les gendarmes!

So I just open my mouth
        and stand there and shout

Je suis fatigué
        du bon pain français.

YES , THAT’S WHAT I SAID –
I’M TIRED OF FRENCH BREAD!